My Whole Being Waits

I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in His word I put my hope. -Psalm 130:5

I read that scripture over the weekend and started weeping because I have experienced this scripture for over 2 years, "My WHOLE BEING WAITS and in HIS WORD, I put MY HOPE"...

For over 2 years, Caden has been OUR son, not officially, but in OUR hearts, in HIS heart, and in YOUR hearts. Yet, throughout the long process of adoption, we have endured a very tough emotional journey.

We have sought the Lord for guidance, cried out, felt defeated, and then regained our FAITH in being sure it would all be final soon. Then quickly we would find ourselves having another pity party- just last week I had a friend meet me to cry and pray with me. "My WHOLE BEING WAITS and in HIS WORD, I put MY HOPE"...

We waited on God's timing when another 3 months of false hope had passed. We’ve met with countless people from CPS caseworkers to attorneys to CASA to FAD workers to fictive kin advocates to firemen to doctors and even had psychological exams.

For two years, we’ve had to run home to make beds, wipe off the counters, and cancel plans or appointments when someone calls to have a home visit on the last day of the month. We've had the number of our couches counted, drawn a floor plan of our home, installed a smoke detector in every single room, took all locking doorknobs off our inside doors, and locked up all medicines. "My WHOLE BEING WAITS and in HIS WORD, I put MY HOPE"...

We’ve written essays on our childhood, essays on discipline policies, and essays on how we handle stress. We have been asked every question imaginable and we’ve all been finger printed and background checked, and so have many of our close friends and family. We have attended countless court dates, visitations and phone calls with Caden’s birth family and the hardest part...in the depths of our souls, we've worried, questioned, prayed, and trusted HIS WORD.

And yes, we have even withdrawn from a lot of activities, service, and ministries during the past 2 years as God has challenged us to live James 1:27 in our very home; our greatest ministry.  "My WHOLE BEING WAITS and in HIS WORD, I put MY HOPE"...

You may even find yourself TIRED FOR US or possibly TIRED OF US and TIRED OF hearing about our adoption process.  Because yes, IT. HAS. BEEN. OUR. ALL. ENCOMPASSING. LIFE.  for over 2 years. Loving, praying, hoping, living, worrying, trusting...roller coaster of emotions for two long years.

Unless you've been through a lengthy adoption process, it's probably hard to truly understand the emotional strains we have been through in the last two years. However, we do so much appreciate so many of you who have gone through adoption and come beside us or those of you who just simply TRIED to understand or sympathize. You have just BEEN THERE for us (even when we have withdrawn into a hole) because WE HAVE NEEDED YOU desperately- to pray for us and with us, to listen to us, to love us, and to encourage us! Some of the sweetest friendships have grown during this time, people we didn't even know that well have given such encouragement and love to us. Thank you all for joining alongside us as we have waited, my heart is so grateful for you all. "My WHOLE BEING WAITS and in HIS WORD, I put MY HOPE"...

I can honestly say this has been the longest continuous season I've ever endured. Speaking of seasons, they end! Hallelujah, praise God seasons end... and I am READY for a celebration!!!!  Last Friday you may have heard my screams and tears of JOY (no matter where you live), we were told...IT IS COMING…IT IS COMING VERY SOON…our ADOPTION DATE WILL BE THIS MONTH!!!! Can I get an AMEN, PRAISE GOD?!?! 

I have several friends who volunteered to help with Caden's Adoption Party; please come celebrate with us! DETAILS COMING SOON!  

By FAITH, this little boy will officially 

be a GREENE THIS MONTH! 

 “I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in His word I put my hope." -Psalm 130:5

ROLLING in Prayer & Paper-Cuts

On our blog 2 weeks ago I asked you, "Friends, will you make a commitment to pray daily for the completion of our adoption? Will you pray for urgency within the department to tie this up with a pretty FAITH BLUE bow? Will you pray for God’s favor upon us?"

All I can say is THANK YOU for your prayers because God heard our prayers and we are now ROLLING (yes, in all caps)!

It is Thursday night and so far this week we've had our home fire inspection by the Fire Marshall, our FBI fingerprints, our reference checks, and the 3rd and final THREE hour meeting with our FAD worker (she finished up our home study with family interviews and pictures of our home). Our FAD worker told us it took us only 2 WEEKS to complete what takes most people 3 MONTHS of paperwork and document collection!  

Can you tell we are ready to have Caden's adoption complete... to have what has been in our hearts, for 2 years, official on paper as well!?! He is ready too! One night last week I put Caden to bed and he got back up and came into the kitchen where I was working. He told me I needed to go to bed too. I told him I was working on adoption paperwork. He said, "Oh never mind, stay up all night if you need to." Sweet boy. 

Again, thank you for your prayers and taking the time to say you are praying for us. It means so much to us. We feel your prayers. Keep praying please! Because what does tomorrow (Friday) hold in this busy week? Another meeting with a different adoption worker. So, you can see we are definitely ROLLING this week! When we finish up with our meeting tomorrow, Chad and I are taking a well deserved 20th anniversary weekend trip to the beach! Awwwwh, can't wait to rest my weary mind and hands... because I may not have gotten morning sickness with this 3rd child, but I've gotten plenty of paper-cuts :)

In closing, the verse God gave us 2 years ago as we began this journey of FAITH still ministers to my soul tonight. Thank you Jesus that Your word is living and active and it penetrates my soul. Hebrews 11:1 "Now FAITH is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see."

"I believe if the Lord wrote us a personal letter from Hebrews 11:1 about faith, it may read like this... My Beloved, Your FAITH will soar when you look up to me and let go of what you see in the natural. Don't you know by now that I am a God who does the supernatural for you if you will allow me to! You no longer have to be controlled by your circumstance; you can chose to live your life fueled by FAITH  in me starting today. What you see will cause you to lose hope, but your FAITH will free you from fear and doubt and give you the power to persevere with passion & purpose. What I say can never be shaken or taken without your permission. Now breathe my child and choose to never again doubt in the darkness what you know to be true in the light. Love, Your Faithful Father"

Hebrews 11:1 What is Faith? It is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see.” -Sheri Rose Shepherd

Update 9/20/12

Hello Friends! It has been way too long since I have updated the blog (more on that later). First, I wanted to reiterate how truly thankful we are for your prayers, financial support, and sincere love to us throughout this 2 year process of adoption. We have seen FAITH BLUE t-shirts in the newspaper, on airplanes & airports, in Florida & even at the Olympics!!! Also, you have told us that you have worn your FAITH BLUE shirts to the hospital for a surgery or Dr appointment, or worn it on a difficult day to remind you that FAITH is the confidence in what we HOPE for and assurance about what we do not see! We also have some precious friends who have a new foster daughter and they purchased one for her as they are on their own journey of FAITH to adopt her as their own daughter!!! Love, love, love it! If you have a FAITH BLUE t-shirt, wear it and share your story of FAITH with us when you get a chance & let it serve as a reminder to pray for us as we still do not have an adoption date. 

Philippians 1:3-6 “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

I sincerely mean that scripture- Oh how I thank God for YOU for your partnership! And can I get an AMEN, on that last part?!?!?!- We are so ready for the completion of our adoption!

 “The great test of faith is that we can wait on God...not push a button and get whatever we want now.” –AW Tozer

Oh how I relate to this quote tonight at 12 midnight! It's been a long day- breakfast duty at school, teaching 20 third graders, a parent conference, a staff meeting, a 2-hour home visit with an adoption worker, and then sitting at the table for another 3 hours filling out paper work that she left for us (I really do love her, by the way). To say “I am exhausted” is an understatement.

As you know, it has been quite some time since I have given an update on the blog. I will be honest; it is because I am tired. I am weary. I am exhausted. We really need your prayers in this process. No, there are not problems with the adoption- even though it has been a truly difficult case in regards to Caden’s birth family. They continue to be supportive- as I said; there are no problems between us or in the case.

I will refrain from speaking negatively about the process we have been through in the last two years. It has definitely been a journey of FAITH. We took a leap of FAITH, and we continue on this journey of FAITH because we were called to do so. When I am weary of the process, I remember that His timing is not my own- but always on time! He is sufficient in everything & not limited by time!

We were really, really aching to have Caden’s adoption finalized in November for National Adoption month, but that won’t happen due to things beyond our control. Believe me, if I could push a button (or email a judge, or call a supervisor, or ….) Oh again, the Tozer quote  keeps ringing true. We ARE on a great test of FAITH as we know that God has given us Hebrews 11:1 as our confidence two years ago when Caden moved in with us.

As I told a dear friend tonight, I don’t want to become jaded by this process. I want JOY in this, even in the midst of long-suffering, and I mean loooooooong-suffering.  I want to be an advocate for adoption when this is over because it IS worth it. It is not about the system, or certainly not about me, but about staying focused on God – because He is not limited by time. And it IS all about that little boy asleep in his FAITH BLUE room- that makes it worth it all.

Many have asked in the last five months for an update. I honestly didn't know what to say because I truly want God to receive GLORY in this! However, after being told things that didn't line up correctly in "the timeline", disappointment and frustration set in deep in my heart as we moved onto our 5th caseworker in 2 years. I felt like if I was honest, my exhaustion/frustration in the process would squash out any glory God could possibly receive. But you know what? I am pretty sure I can be authentic with you because I know YOU fight similar struggles such as these as well. So I am going to be real and know that God will still receive His due glory because He is God!!! May He receive glory even in the midst of my frustration. So here it is-  it’s been such a long, complicated, and grueling process that I temporally lost the beautiful story God has given us in this! Do you ever forget the beauty in the story He has done in your life? We forget to see it as He does- He sees the ENTIRE journey and not just the point you are stuck in, for what seems like years (literally)! 

So Lord, remind me… sing it to me again- the fragrant aroma of the offering of adoption and how You Lord, have adopted US- You brought us into Your family and loved us! Thank you Lord, I am forever grateful.

Friends, will you make a commitment to pray daily for the completion of our adoption? Will you pray for urgency within the department to tie this up with a pretty FAITH BLUE bow? Will you pray for God’s favor upon us?

We are not alone- will you pray for other families and children waiting for adoption? Will you pray for families that have adopted, fostering, or in kinship care right now- they need your support and prayers. Will you pray for the social workers, attorneys, CPS & private agencies that deal with such heavy & emotional cases? Will you pray for the children across the U.S. growing up in foster care, and others that face life without their fathers and/or mothers? Will you pray that the church (worldwide) would grasp and reflect God’s heart for adoption and orphan care?

  

We are weary tonight, but know JOY comes in the morning! 

Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

Psalm 82:3 "Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed."

Hosea 14:3 "For in you [God] the fatherless find compassion."

James 1:27 "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress…."

By Faith,

Tammy for the Greene's 

PS Please comment here or on Facebook if you are making a commitment to pray. Again so thankful for each of you; Philippians 1:3-6 “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Faith T-Shirts

It has been four months since we have updated the blog so a big welcome to those of you who are new to our adoption blog! If you are new to our blog, please read our first post listed at the bottom of this post (or on right margin).

We sincerely thank you for the support and prayer you have given us throughout the last year and a half as we have embraced this calling of FAITH. It's been a long and emotional process, but we rejoice in being told that our official adoption date will be in three to six months! Can we get a "Hallelujah!"?!?!

With that said, we are needing to finish out our "Canvas of Faith" adoption fund. We have designed a t-shirt to help us with that and hope you find the design inspiring in your own lives as well! If you order a t-shirt, your name will be listed on the back of our "Canvas of Faith" and two squares will be painted in for each t-shirt sold.

The scripture we placed on the t-shirt in “Faith Blue” represents the confidence God placed in our hearts as we began this journey so long ago. We are so thankful for this child that God has made a part of our family, and we anxiously await the final season of the adoption process to be complete!  

You can access the t-shirt order form through Google Docs by clicking this link: T-Shirt Order Form

We will only be taking orders for 3 weeks, so all orders are due Wednesday, May 9. You can turn these orders in to the people/places listed on the form as delivery options.

Be looking here on the blog for an announcement of our upcoming adoption party in late summer/early fall! We want to see you there in your FAITH BLUE shirts!

Sincerely, Chad, Tammy, Kelsey, Colton & Caden Greene  

"As you can see, we are a family, the five of us."

If you have not read about our adoption journey, please see our first post below: Our First Blog Post- July 2011

Hello friends & family! 
Merry Christmas!

 
If you are not able to read my entire post today, make sure you view the video at the end, you will be blessed! Also, If this is your first time to visit our blog, please read our adoption story here: http://byfaithhebrews11.blogspot.com/2011/07/dear-friends-family-july-2011-in-early.html

I apologize so much time has passed since my last post. One of the things I wanted to share on our blog was what we did to celebrate Caden living with us for ONE YEAR on October 24th! We will still have an upcoming Adoption Day to celebrate, but for now we wanted to do something very unique to rejoice in this special ONE YEAR anniversary! Of course I researched all of this (because I research everything, ha!). Well, in the adoption world, most call it “Gotcha Day”, but I wanted to make it more our own! So with the day falling on October 24th, the fall weather called for a “S’more Day”! So on October 24, 2011 we celebrated adding “Some More” (S’more) love, fun & happiness to our family! 

Here are some pictures from 
The Greene’s First Annual S’more Day 
with a family picnic, S’mores, and pumpkin carving!

And now for some frequently asked questions:

Q: Is the Adoption complete? 

A: No, not yet, but we’ve had several more court dates recently and are now closer than we were last month. A lot of hurdles have recently been crossed & we are just enjoying life, but we do LONG for the adoption to become official!

Q: Is the Canvas of Faith complete and how much more money do you need for the adoption?  

A: No, the Canvas of Faith is not full, but it is only about 350 squares shy of being completely full! It has been exactly what we have needed at every stage! Isn't that just how God is; He is always enough, whatever need you have! Thank you for being willing vessels as you have supported us! Because of the complexity of this (birth family case- us not in foster care, nor a relative) we have had many court dates attached to this case, but that is coming to a close as we draw nearer to the adoption. Just recently, more hurdles have been crossed & we are getting closer! I could never EVER thank you enough for all of the love you have given us. The names written on the back of that beautiful blue canvas mean SO much to us! You have been OUR SUPPORT financially and prayerfully as we have simply said "Yes" and been obedient to God's call... and so have YOU also, by being obedient in your "Yes"! Thank you for being our support in so many different areas! Not everyone is able to adopt, but everyone can be a support for the adoptive family…from a listening ear, to babysitting, to prayer...We are thankful for you, our support team! As far as money needed to complete the canvas, we will offer some upcoming raffles and of course donations are still welcome! Once the canvas is complete, I have an amazing idea in my mind to paint on top of the squares; I can’t wait to see how it turns out! Once our adoption is final, we will invite you, our support, to an adoption party with the completed Canvas of Faith.

Q: What is your relationship with Caden’s birth family? 
A: As most of you know, we first met Caden’s birth family through church in early 2010 and tried to help them with some basic needs (see our first blog post for the full story). However, when Caden was about to be placed in foster care, his birth mother asked us to take him for an undetermined amount of time. After many court dates and hurdles we were told in May of 2011 that we could adopt, but it would take some time. We have never fought against his birth family, only doing as we were asked (by birth family, as well as God) and walked obediently in the next step. However, that doesn't mean I haven't had deep emotional struggles with their place in his future life as we have moved forward with adoption simply because I didn't want to "share" him with anyone. (Did you catch that...it was about "me"!) I have often said this is not about us, and that is truly my heart, even though my flesh has moments of selfishness before I allow the spirit to step in. 

Recently I saw an adoption t-shirt that said: 

"This is not about me!" 

On the back of the shirt it said, 

"It's not about you either!" 

AMEN & AMEN! 

What a great reminder as it has always been & should always be about 2 things that work together: 1) Walking in obedience to what God called us to do 2) A little boy named Caden. 

"God never promises to remove us from our struggles. 

He does promise to change the way we look at them." -Max Lucado

He certainly did just that at our Christmas Party with Caden’s birth family. His birth mother and grandmother gave us a very special & selfless gift....they gave us all of Caden’s Christmas ornaments from birth! I was so touched, I couldn't stop crying! It was such a symbolic gift to me, as if they were giving me Caden’s future along with his past. It was a heart changing day for me, as two worlds and families came together for one special little boy. Again I was reminded, "This is not about me!" and "It's not about you either" as both of our families have made different types of emotional scarifies to do what is best for Caden and his future. His birth family is very thankful, supportive, and respectful to us and we are working together to come up with appropriate boundaries and contact in the best interest of Caden and his emotional well being. I realize this is not for everyone in adoption, but we believe this is best for Caden and our unique situation.

One of Caden's ornaments that his birth family gave to us.

In closing, I want to encourage you to “Let Your Light Shine” just as performed here by one amazing little boy named Caden, who now calls me “Mom”. 

Please view & be blessed: 

I realize this is our adoption blog, but I feel negligent not to mention Kelsey & Colton here as well, since this is our Christmas post. At present, Kelsey is serving at Mission Arlington's Christmas Store, with her college BSM group. She is doing well in college, and pursuing a degree in Dental Hygiene. Colton is a sophomore in high school and is active in his youth group and band. He has such a gentle and serving heart like his father.

 

 

Merry Christmas from our home to yours!

Friends, I wanted to ask you to join in prayer about something near & dear to our hearts. November is National Adoption Month, and today (Nov 6) is Orphan Sunday.

JOIN IN PRAYING FOR:
-Children across the U.S. growing up in foster care, and others that face life without their fathers and/or mothers.
- Families that have adopted, mentored and/or fostered
- Social workers and other officials serving foster children
-Churches and nonprofits with adoption/foster/global orphan ministries
-The Church in the U.S. and worldwide to grasp and reflect God’s heart for adoption and orphan care
-Orphans worldwide:  physical provision, protection, love and belonging, and to know the love of God
- Personal guidance in how to reflect God’s heart through thoughtful action, advocacy and continued prayer

Scripture:

He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow... -Deuteronomy 10:18

…For in you [God] the fatherless find compassion. -Hosea 14:3

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families…Psalms 68:5-6

The Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.  And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”  The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. -Romans 8:15-16 (God’s Heart for Us...He adopted us, He brought us into His family and loved us.)

Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.”…and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir. -Galatians 4:6-7

Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed. -Psalm 82:3 (God’s Call to Us)

Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow. -Isaiah 1:17

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress. -James 1:27

Waiting
"When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer." -Corrie Ten Boom

Many have asked us lately "Is the adoption final yet?" We answer "No, not yet, moving forward though". However, to be honest it feels more like we are stuck in neutral, in the waiting phase. 

We were told several months back to be ready because September would push everything forward in a fast way. Well, September came and went, and we are still waiting to move forward. 

Waiting is hard, it is a BATTLE. 

Waiting has made me anxious.

But we wait, because HE is sovereign and in control. We remind ourselves that, "Having FAITH means having FAITH in His timing." So we fight, armed with the Lord's strength, to be patient in the waiting. 


We have experienced some sweet blessings in the waiting and we have learned some things in the waiting as well...

In waiting:

• In waiting, this month marks ONE YEAR, 365 beautiful days of Caden living with us. 
• In waiting, Caden told one of my friends, "Hey, you know I didn't grow in her (pointed to me) belly, right?...I grew in her heart."
• In waiting, I hear "Mom" more than "Tam Tam" these days.
• In waiting, I found these books in Caden's bed when I woke him up a couple of weeks ago...THIS made my heart leap for JOY! He DESIRES to seek the Lord!

• In waiting, you have continued to bless us with your donations to Canvas of Faith so that when the time is here, we are READY and not waiting for financial reasons. 
• In waiting, some have committed to monthly pledges until the canvas is full. Thank you!

10/10/11

• In waiting, you have continued to love on us and some have told us they have committed to praying for our adoption daily in this long process. Thank you for lifting us up!
• In waiting, we have have grown in our Faith and utter dependence on Him.
• In waiting, we are learning what it truly means to "Trust & Obey" If God had showed us exactly what was ahead of us a year ago, we would've never had to really trust Him.
• In waiting, we are learning to be content. Philippians 4:11 
• In waiting, we are learning to not be anxious, but to just live the abundant life in the waiting. John 10:10 (If you know us well, you know this has been a big victory, Go God!)

I usually don't issue a challenge on my blog, but feel compelled to do so today. Do you find yourself waiting for something today? The devil uses FEAR but "God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, sound mind, and of self control." 2 Timothy 1:7 In this time of waiting in your life, starve your FEAR with FAITH. In your season of waiting, may you GROW in faith as you depend on Him. 

"Continue to wait in hope...although the promise may linger, it will never come too late." -Spurgeon

"Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him." -Psalm 37:7

Faith & the Color Blue

Many have asked why the canvas is painted the color "BLUE"....

~Faith & the Color Blue~

It has been almost a year now since Caden came to live with us. 

So much of our lives have changed in a year! 

We call out spelling words again! 

Read AR books again!

And the tooth fairy visits our home again!  

What sweet blessings to do this again since Kelsey is now in college & Colton is a sophomore in high school.

When Caden first moved in, Kelsey offered to share her room with him, since another bed would fit in Kelsey’s room better than in Colton’s. Quickly we saw that we had to come up with another “bedroom” in our home as a 7-year-olds toys were rapidly filling up our high school seniors bedroom! So last year, during Christmas break we moved Kelsey out of her childhood room and into the enclosed garage. We were able to make it some-what like a studio apartment for her with her own entrance and sitting area. So now Caden had a room of his own, something he had never had….but it was PURPLE!!! Getting both rooms moved and set up (big fruit basket turn over!) took some time, so we decided to put the painting on hold another month or so until we had more time.

At this point, Caden had been living with us for almost 4 months, and we were very attached already…us to him, and him to us. One Saturday, Caden mentioned he wanted his room to be blue. I privately called Chad into Caden’s room and told him that I knew we needed to paint, but I just could not paint that room blue, absolutely NOT BLUE! I explained that BLUE is the color for little boys, and if he didn’t stay with us forever, I just couldn’t bare walking by that blue room. 

Chad looked at me and grabbed my hands and said, “I have FAITH, we are painting this room BLUE!” I love that man for his faith & obedience, and cry every time I remember that day. So that very day Chad purchased a “can of commitment”. …FAITH  BLUE paint for the walls of Caden’s room.

After 7 months, I received the phone call we had anxiously been waiting for, the official word that the state’s goal for Caden was adoption by us. Chad was at work when I got the call and I was tempted to call him, but I knew the perfect place to tell him. When Chad walked through the door, I told him to come to Caden’s room, and we sat down and I asked him, “What color are these walls? He said “Blue”, I said “What color of Blue?” We both started crying as he answered “FAITH  BLUE”.

So as you can see there was really no other color fitting for this vision God gave us for our adoption canvas.... FAITH BLUE!

We continue to walk by FAITH this path to follow God's will in making Caden our son. Thank you all for your prayers and your continued emotional and financial support as the journey is still long, but God is FAITHFUL!!! 

"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see."  

 Hebrews 11:1
Canvas of Faith on 9/3/11

Faith Blue in action is quite beautiful, isn't it?

Oh so beautiful is this story that God is writing and we are humbled and honored to join Him. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for joining us on this journey of FAITH!